Feeling a little weak

I've run out of all medicine ( including Xanax) I saved two just in case.

I called my doctor and he returned my phone call ....left a message that he did not have any availability for last week..... but he did for this week. I was busy moving furniture from one apartment to the other...and I wasn't able to set up an appointment for this week. Will be doing so next week.... I want to get on the Lexapro for just a month or two more. I really felt it was helpful and allowed me to "heal". I am not fond of the idea of staying on it. I don't feel my body or mind should rely on any kind of medicine.

Tomorrow my son is leaving for his summer vacation. I was doing ok, until I thought about him leaving. He's going to have so much fun, but I am still going to miss him.

I am beginning to realize I might suffer from a severe form separation anxiety. Every panic attack ( except for one) that I have had has been while I am away from him. Two of them in the airport. Today I started feeling very weak - no hyperventilation- but just weak. Almost as if I were to exert myself too much I might faint. Shallow breathing. A few heart palpitations here and there...no "panic" feeling though. No psychological panic - just weakness. No sensation in the upper nasal area like before....

Interesting...

Tomorrow will be a big day. I am taking him to the airport and it's going to be at LaGuardia the place where I had my last panic attack. I think I will be ok. I'll be proud of myself if everything goes well...

Speaking of proud... well my son makes me so proud. He went through so much this year. And was able to tough it out, pass 7th grade, and still keep the shine in eyes and love in his heart. He makes it all worth it. That's why no matter what happens I'll keep fighting and staying strong for his sake.